


let's get lost (tonight)

by starsurge



Category: Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Flirting, Getting Together, Hopeless pining, M/M, Partying, fastburn, sly!jihoon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-03
Updated: 2018-05-03
Packaged: 2019-05-01 18:44:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14526816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starsurge/pseuds/starsurge
Summary: In a game of what seems like wild goose chase, Jihoon realizes he's not afraid of loving someone; he's afraid of losing someone that he likes.





	let's get lost (tonight)

**(i.)**

  
Daniel crashes into Jihoon’s life with no regards to consequences.

It’s on Jihoon’s first party as a freshman at college that they meet as if the universe has set it up all along.

He has heard about Kang Daniel before: star and leader of the dance crew at campus, third year from the political sciences department, big boy with an equally big heart and bright smile. Easy to be around, the centre of every social gathering whether it be done consciously or subconsciously. Someone who could have any person they desire wrapped around their finger in no time but contrary to popular belief, his dating record is rather clean.

Jihoon has heard enough about Daniel to know that they wouldn’t click. In his honest and raw opinion, Daniel’s image seems to be too perfect to be real. There has to be a catch; most likely hookups no one knows about, or his pretty and kind demeanour being only a facade.

As for himself, it’s common knowledge that he uses his charms to gain advantages and benefits — at least Jihoon’s friends know. Pretty face with youth-like features, bright eyes that bear the universe in them and captivate anyone that gets a look too deep, it is too easy to slip into the role of the innocent boy at the front of the lectures.

He isn’t out to allure anyone in the long run but rather to put himself out there while still being able to judge strangers from a comfortable distance; which doesn’t seem to be the possible case upon meeting Daniel for the very first time.

It’s a mystery to Jihoon how he has even managed to gain Daniel’s attention. Throughout the night, there doesn’t seem to be a single moment where Daniel isn’t surrounded by a group of suitors, or friends. How could he not attract others if he’s the sun of their universe? Daniel is the shining star amongst them and burns in his demanding presence without being overbearing. It irks Jihoon to no end and he can’t even explain the reason behind his annoyance.

Maybe their differences that suit each other are part of the problem: How Daniel is the one blessed with natural confidence, while Jihoon is the inconspicuous ace in the game. His aura is less powerful, but rather a muted fire attracting lost wanderers on their way. Jihoon is the one who knows how to play his cards; Daniel is the one with the lucky hand.

Fortunes that won’t work on Jihoon.

“You look like someone who doesn’t want to be at this party.” Daniel’s voice is deep but sonorous, bright at its edges. It suits him all too much. “Here, loosen up a bit, will you?”

Before Jihoon even has the chance to defend himself, Daniel shoves a red cup with beer as its content into his hand, fingers grazing and lingering longer than necessary. The touch is electrifying, not that Jihoon would admit it. He doesn’t make an attempt to pull his hand away though, letting the knuckles of their fingers touch in a feathery way.

“No offense, but you could have put something into my drink.” There’s nothing accusatory in Jihoon’s voice — it was but simply a dry remark. How it has Daniel shaking to his core, his broad shoulders moving up and down and his chest heaving from his full laughter, leaves Jihoon puzzled and speechless.

“You’re right, I could have. I can assure you that I’m not one of those guys, though.”

Jihoon merely regards Daniel with a hum of feigned acknowledgement, but it is hard to stay focused on his cold pretense while being eyed by the older boy with amusement and sparked interest. Warm eyes that glimmer with mirth are heavy on Jihoon, who can practically feel how Daniel is drinking him up with his attentive stare. Truth to be told, the feeling isn’t all too unpleasant; not if he’s being eyed by others with seething jealousy.

Having the power to put Daniel into a reserversal position, to let the embodiment of the sun be the one orbiting around another star, puts Jihoon into a high that he’s welcoming with open arms.

“I’m glad that there are still men out there who don’t have rotten ulterior intentions.” Words calculated to throw out the perfect bait, Jihoon looks up at Daniel with innocent eyes, his long eyelashes fluttering against his skin. It has Daniel’s breath hitching noticeably, but the moment of shock is quickly replaced with an easy and lazy grin, which in return has Jihoon’s knees go weak.

“You’re a sly one, aren’t you? From the moment on I saw you I knew that you aren’t as coy as you pretend to be.” Daniel punctates his statement with a light-hearted chuckle, eyes crunching up into the shape of crescent moons in the process. For some reason, it throws Jihoon more out of the loop than Daniel’s spot-on judgement.

In the essence of the happenings, Daniel is giving Jihoon more than enough reasons to be irked with the boy further.

Surprisingly, he manages to intrigue Jihoon instead to play his game of being hard to get that is only reserved for those that have actually caught his prikle attention.

“I like you. Can I keep you?” For a request so shameless, Daniel sure doesn’t crumble in confidence. Quite the opposite, he even seems to be assured that his weird pick-up line would work on Jihoon. Maybe it does on others who throw themselves at Daniel’s feet willingly; Jihoon however has his pride to be saved.

“I’m not a pet to be kept. Sorry boo, but you aren’t getting into these pants tonight.”

With his head held high, Jihoon slips back into the crowd without sparing Daniel even as much as a glance.

Watching Jihoon’s retreating back, Daniel is rooted to his place, another easy smile playing on his lips, rather than a dejected expression from the obvious rejection.

“I’ll make you mine,” Daniel whispers to himself, determination strong in his voice. The flames of desire that were ignited and are now consuming Daniel’s world of emotions, it is the driving force that has him going. He’ll win Jihoon’s heart over; he’ll make Jihoon his as much as he is already Jihoon’s, who has Daniel’s heart in his palms without being aware of the fragility that he’s holding.

 

* * *

 

**(ii.)**

 

Daniel stays as a persistent constant in Jihoon’s life.

Before the party, he has heard about the popular boy at campus. Now he never fails to see Daniel in his daily life almost as if the older boy is orbiting around Jihoon.

Their paths are more likely to cross than ever expected; not only are their departments close by, but so does Jihoon have to pass the entrance to the dance studio of the campus on his way to his dorm.

Often times Jihoon meets Daniel before his practices, but never stops to engage in a conversation. What for anyway? He doesn’t want to hold Daniel back from his responsibilities; neither does he want to delay his walk back to his own haven (read: his room).

There’s nothing to be talked about with Daniel. Just because the older boy has hit on him during a party (unsuccessfully may he add) doesn’t mean that Jihoon should be forced into conversing with him further.

Jihoon is _not_ interested in Kang Daniel and absolutely nothing can change his feelings towards him.

Not even further advances on him made by Daniel during future parties will help the matter anyhow.

To Jihoon, the flirting game is a fun one to play. Highlight of the nights. Jihoon doesn't attend parties out of the urge to get wasted; it's part of his routine to keep his connections thriving while dwindling away an otherwise boring Saturday night with entertainment. Drunk people have the best stories to be told; flirty people always spark amusement in Jihoon. It's no different with Daniel.

Second time that he's getting approached by Daniel, the latter's approach is even more direct.

"You're really a wallflower on this party, but to me you're the prettiest one." Daniel's voice is dripping of confidence, matching his aloof aura, and his straight stance doesn't falter with the mocking snort following as a reply from Jihoon.

"Nice try, but your pick-up lines still suck." There's a teasing lilt in Jihoon's honest jab, which Daniel takes rather well. Instead of feeling wounded in his pride as any other macho boy would and make a fuss about it, Daniel laughs wholeheartedly and pats Jihoon's shoulder in a friendly way. A gesture to convey that there are no hard feelings involved. It's a character trait that Jihoon appreciates quite a lot and makes Daniel's presence more bearable.

"Okay, tell me one thing, pretty: Why are you always keeping in the shadows? I know that you aren't a shy one." At the definite assumptions, Jihoon tilts his head to the side and cocks his eyebrow up in question. No matter the amount of truth that’s etched in those few harmless words aside, Jihoon isn't going to give Daniel the pleasure of admitted victory so soon.

He hasn't earned himself the title of "brat" among his friends so easily.

"Shy people can put themselves out there just as much as someone who is outgoing can have trouble being in the center of attention." It effectively shuts Daniel up, who seems troubled coming up with a fitting answer, and Jihoon would be lying if he doesn't admit that he finds satisfaction in seeing the boy with the big words struggling to match "wallflower" Jihoon.

Instead Daniel reverts to laughing again as if it's a coping mechanism, but this time it's less full and more pressed than before. Jihoon’s lips curl into a small smile and he wonders if he has finally scared Daniel off. Has Daniel finally come to the realization that their personalities are too clashing and not fit to be a match? That Jihoon is only giving Daniel his time of the day to waste away time?

"You have quite an attitude. I like it." Daniel's toothy grin that comes with ease is back on full display, but his eyes are sparkling with curiosity and something akin to... admiration? It's a boost to Jihoon's ego, but it does play around with heart just as much — even if Jihoon is unwilling to recognize the turmoil inside himself.

"What's your name? I'm sure you already know mine."

It's a basic question; one that is required in first talks. Daniel's outstretched hand is a good-willed offer and part of routine in society's etiquette. Jihoon doesn't even know why he's hesitating to return the handshake. Maybe he worries too much about the ties that come along with getting to know your flirt too well; quite the unwarranted thought, as so much is Jihoon able to admit.

Eventually, Jihoon takes Daniel's hand into his own. His palm is warm and feels heavy in his hand, most likely due to the size difference. Daniel's grip is assured and inviting; it almost feels right to be in his hold.

As quickly as the thought flashes through his mind does Jihoon take it to the gutter to get rid off the poison that consumes him.

There's no way Jihoon can allow himself to indulge in Daniel's presence any longer for tonight.

"Name's Jihoon. Don't get any false illusions."

The sparks that are glimmering in Daniel's eyes seem to tell otherwise.

 

* * *

 

“Have you noticed that two of the guys from the bar have been checking you out for a while now?”

As if it’s their own thing now, Daniel approaches Jihoon out of the blue and starts a mundane conversation wrapped up in a heavy layer of flirtiness that doesn’t fly past Jihoon’s head. The issue that Daniel has broached tonight is quite a strange way of persuasion, but it does the trick to pull Jihoon in.

"Yeah, they're not exactly discreet." With that, Jihoon cocks his head to the side and sends an effortless wink to their way, watches how their pupils dilate and turn dark from lust. Before his daring teasing gets mistaken as an invitation, Jihoon leans against Daniel’s side, hiding his face in the crook of the other male’s neck. An overwhelming yet fresh scent of fine quality wafts right to Jihoon’s nose and clouds his senses; he just wants to stay there and drown in Daniel’s pleasing smell.

It is the large and warm hand that cautiously plays with the fine hairs on his nape that pulls Jihoon back to reality and he almost gives himself a whiplash by how quickly he’s out of Daniel’s personal space. Cheeks dusted in baby pink, there’s no way to cover up his embarrassment caused by his liking to the intimate situation.

As so to save himself out of the quagmire, Jihoon decides to rile Daniel up once again and play around with fire. “Do you reckon that they want me to join a threesome? I mean, they’re practically undressing me with their sleazy stares.”

Curiosity sparkling in his eyes, Jihoon looks up at the older boy with anticipation to his reaction and much to his surprise is met with a calm expression. Only the painful clench of his jaw gives Daniel’s discontent with the question away.

“Does it matter? That’s not the type of playing around that you like.” For once it is Jihoon that meets Daniel’s statement with a bemused laugh, thus ridiculing the matter at hand. It’s quite interesting how easy the other falls into the obvious traps without even noticing.

After all, Daniel seems to be just like any other college boy desperate to have a successful catch.

“Is that jealousy or your fragile masculinity that I hear?” Jihoon’s smiles like a Cheshire cat at Daniel, who looks shocked at the mocking jab at him. Lost in his words, he’s gaping at the boy who’s won on all lines, but catches himself as quickly as possible. In no way can Daniel let go off his built up persona because of one flirt gone wrong, right?

“Why are you so stubborn?” A mixture of frustration and hurt lace Daniel’s words, his feelings displayed out in the open in his pleading eyes. It is evident that he’s admitting to his loss but differently than Jihoon has imagined.

Guilt is coming to knock at Jihoon’s front door, asking to be let in and settle the silent war between them.

“Is it so hard for you to accept that someone could genuinely like you? Don’t you want to let someone get close to you?” Daniel rambles on and on without taking a breath, giving Jihoon no other option but to listen to the truth that he’s tried to hide. No one has ever accused him of the right things before; it’s always been him being “up-tight” and having a “stick up his ass”. Him being too arrogant.

Just what exactly is the deal with Daniel?

“If you don’t have any interest in me and feel uncomfortable, tell me to go. I’ll respect this wish from now on.”

Jihoon merely has to tell Daniel to go. It couldn’t be any more obvious that there’s only one way to continue this and it certainly doesn’t involve mindless flirting to pass time. Daniel wants certainty and the promise of steadiness in his life with Jihoon. His intentions couldn’t be any clearer; Jihoon isn’t only another small fish in the pond of many.

It would be so easy to say “go, leave me alone". Alternatively he could be even more direct and say "it's been fun with you but I don't want to get tied down." Because that's what Jihoon is all about, isn't it? He doesn't know if he's ready for commitment. He doesn't know if he's ready for commitment with Daniel. He does know that Daniel is trying. He does know that he's been hard on Daniel and yet it has never stopped him from trying even more.

He does know that he could try for Daniel as well. The spark of interest has long been set off by Daniel himself and together they would make the most beautiful firework as the colors of their heart are unique but complementary at the same time.

Scared. Jihoon is scared that someone might have managed to worm their way into his heart regardless. It's new — it's different. He can't keep on playing around because it's not a game anymore. Maybe it's never been a game after all.

Maybe there's no winner. Only two losers that try too hard to keep up with each other.

"I see." Daniel's low voice cuts through Jihoon's haze but doesn't work as his anchor; it only makes him float even higher with no hold. This time around it isn't Jihoon who leaves Daniel behind — this time around it's the feared opposite.

Or is it?

 

* * *

 

**(iii.)**

 

Jihoon doesn’t get approached at parties anymore. At least not by the one person that he’s looking forward to seeing every time he sets foot into a social gathering he could care less about.

No one ever gets the same treatment as Daniel does. He’s not out there anymore to search for a fun flirt that kills time; he’s grown out of that stage. Those close to him tell Jihoon that he’s a goner for Daniel. It’s the easiest solution to consider yet Jihoon himself would merely brush it off as a slight infatuation.

Daniel on the other hand is royally and utterly screwed for Jihoon. Even if he doesn’t make an attempt to approach Jihoon anymore, the latter can still feel Daniel’s longing eyes on him. The intensity of his stares make Jihoon’s skin crawl in the most pleasing ways that a chill running down his body can feel like.

For a while, they tip-toe around each other without losing the person they desire out of sight.

Three weeks later and Jihoon almost loses all hope until Daniel surprises him in the most unexpected twist.

Slowly but surely the warm temperatures find their way into the land and give Jihoon the perfect opportunity to find himself out on the balcony of the apartment. He’s made new connections who had invited him to a more exclusive party, but Jihoon does need a break from the placed attention on him by strangers sometimes. Maybe he also needs a break from hopelessly looking around for Daniel; there’s no certainty that he was invited.

Jihoon doesn’t even know why he’s putting his hopes high. It’s a childish mindset to believe every love story would have a perfect fairy tale ending.

Breathing in the crisp air of the night, Jihoon leans against the railing of the balcony and throws his head back lazily. One moment for himself to clear his mind — that’s what he badly needs.

Nothing ever goes his way anymore.

“I’ve heard that the stars are jealous of you.” The voice that resonates in the air is the one that manages to make Jihoon’s heart skip a beat; eyelashes fluttering open right away, his gaze falls on Daniel, who comes closer to him in an unsteady step. Body swaying side to side, it’s more than obvious that he’s out of it, which gets Jihoon nervous from one moment to the next. Never before has he seen Daniel drunk; he’s always been composed and in touch with reality.

Jihoon wonders what it means for him to see a wasted version of Daniel.

“You can’t even see the stars from here.” As a way to test the waters, Jihoon uses his usually witty remarks to loosen up the tense atmosphere, chuckling awkwardly at his own words. He’s expecting the other boy to break out into laughter again; instead he merely gets a sad smile that seems a bit too forced back.

On top of the failed start to their conversation, Jihoon has to rush and help Daniel stand steady, save his handsome face from meeting the ground in a free-fall. In his intoxicated state, Daniel clearly doesn’t know how to coordinate his body and puts his whole weight on Jihoon, who has a difficult time keeping the other up. It’s a wonder that he somehow manages to have Daniel lean against the railing after a few attempts of fighting off Daniel’s hugs.

“I just-just want to hold your hand again.” Daniel slurs out while reaching out with his clumsy hand for Jihoon’s own hand, which has him taking pity on the older boy and granting his innocent wish. The faint blush that is creeping up on his cheeks is merely the work of a slightly chilly wind and definitely doesn’t have anything to do with them holding hands or Daniel’s utterly happy smile stretching across his face.

For a few long drawn out moments, they’re standing huddled together on the balcony, hand in hand, heartbeats synced together.

Jihoon’s heart is drumming furiously against his chest; yet all he hears is Daniel’s own melody matching.

“I want to kiss you.” Daniel’s pleading voice attracts Jihoon’s full attention on him, who’s gulping nervously from being void of any answer. It seems as if that should be the intention anyway. “I want to hug you. Hold your hand. Take you out on a date. Fuck, you’re so beautiful, do you know that? But you’re more than just beauty. You’re so so attractive in so many ways.”

Daniel rambles on and on without giving Jihoon a chance to put in a word. Either way, it doesn’t matter; Jihoon’s mind has long shut off while his heart is soaking up each and every word of Daniel’s confession. For a moment, he lets himself forget that Daniel is drunk, is out of his mind, is saying whatever his impulses prod him on to say.

“Shit, I know you don’t want me, but I still can’t help falling for you.”

How much truth lies in a drunk man’s word?

Jihoon wonders.

Should he listen to his heart and accept the confession? There’s nothing that Daniel could lose besides his dignity, his reputation, himself. Daniel has put so much on the line to finally have his feelings be heard; shouldn’t he deserve a chance?

Jihoon wonders and hesitates.

His other hand subconsciously reaches out for Daniel’s jaw, grasping it in his fingers cautiously, experimentally.

Silence falls over them, tensed and buzzing with anticipation. Breath drawn in and held back, Jihoon gazes into Daniel’s warm brown eyes jittering all over the place from nervousness. He notices Daniel’s lips quivering just the slightest.

Jihoon doesn’t need to wonder anymore; the truth has never been clearer for him than now.

“Here you are!”

It only takes three words to break the spell bounded moment, to lift off the magic that has been veiling them. What Jihoon has been yearning for is being taken away from him without consideration to him.

“Sorry, Daniel has to go home now. Thanks for taking care of him.” Some tall guy that Jihoon vaguely remembers as Daniel’s friend (presumably) helps steady Daniel and soon enough, there’s another guy taking Daniel’s other side to get him away from the scene.

_Poor Niellie. I’ve never seen him so wasted before._

_More like, you’ve never seen him crushing for someone so hard before._

Jihoon wonders: Is this his last chance?

It makes his heart ache and suddenly he knows: He’s not afraid of loving someone; he’s afraid of losing someone that he likes.

 

* * *

 

Daniel had suddenly appeared in Jihoon’s life and conquered his heart unknowingly along the way.

He’s grown tired of knocking on Jihoon’s door to his heart but after all hope has been lost, Jihoon has found the courage to invite him in with open arms.

It’s always been a one-way road; it is now Jihoon’s responsibility to give and not only take.

Easier said than done — Sunday is spent on the brink of a breakdown without even an attempt to reach out to Daniel. Instead he overthinks Daniel’s words, inspects the meanings from every side and corner possible. He imagines the scenarios that he could get himself in regarding Daniel. Sweats over the drunk confession again and again and again.

The realization that he has to take the matters into his own hands hit him again on Monday afternoon; more precisely the moment he sees Daniel again on his way to the dance studio. If Jihoon holds back one more time, they’ll be done for.

Jihoon isn’t one to shy away from opportunities but even he can feel his heart racing furiously the closer he gets to Daniel.

Daniel, who obviously tries to escape from Jihoon. Something that he can’t even be mad about; he has brought it upon himself to get avoided by the one who has given his all.

However, Jihoon is now the one being persistent. The one taking action. First step: Stop Daniel from escaping (which is once again easier said than done considering that Daniel’s legs take up about 90% of his whole body.)

“Daniel! Please wait.” There’s no way around gaining the other’s attention other than calling him out in public, which does the trick to halt Daniel in his haste steps. His few moments of hesitation give Jihoon the chance to catch up on him and hold lightly onto Daniel’s arm to hopefully get across the message that there’s no way out for the older boy. “Hey, do you have a moment? We need to talk.”

It aches Jihoon’s heart to see Daniel’s dejected expression and slump in frame from what is most likely fear of rejection.

“I promise I won’t bother you again.”

“Wha- what. You did nothing wrong, Daniel.” Jihoon heaves an exasperated sigh and in the heat of the moment, his mind subconsciously decides that words aren’t enough to express his good intentions.

Slotting his fingers into Daniel’s, he takes the older boy by hand and tugs him away from the entrance of the dance studio into the gardens of the campus. Luckily for him, Daniel follows him without showing any resistance but his lips continue to stay sealed in a thin line. It really is all on Jihoon now.

Under a cherry blossom tree that starts to unfold in its full glory, Jihoon stops in his tracks and turns around on his heels to face Daniel, noticing the tension in his badly kept up poker face. No one could be any more obvious than Daniel who wears his heart on his sleeve and it is obvious how he’s still fearing for the last, final verdict.

Taking a deep breath, Jihoon decides that it’s now all or nothing.

Along with the gush of a wind, Jihoon makes an impulsive decision and tiptoes on his feet to gain leverage and reach Daniel’s cheek, pressing his lips gently against the warm skin.

In a whirlwind, a few pink pale flowers float around the two boys, who are caught up in their game of love.

Except that it has long stopped being a game. It’s all real now — or so Jihoon hopes.

“I know I haven’t been fair to you but I want to give you a chance. I like you. Can you give me another chance, too?”

The promise of love is sealed with a kiss under the cherry blossom tree.

 

__ fin __

**Author's Note:**

> first things first: big thank you to kelly for supporting me throughout the whole writing process ♡ 
> 
> i've had this basic idea in my mind after listening to sewoon's just u and with her help, i managed to come up with a solid plot; she's the real mvp~
> 
> it was fun to write jihoon's character in this story, i hope you all like him as well...
> 
> thanks for coming so far and you can find me on my [twitter](http://twitter.com/sagglxy) ♡


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